You’re Letting Us All Down

Posted by Ben @ January 21st, 2010 11:30 pm. Filed under: Duplicate Petitions,Hang on -- This Should've Been Rejected,There's Already A Solution But Don't Let That Stop You From Bothering The PM — Tags: Mr. C. Baker, Steven J. Grimwade —

You’ve seen this petition before. We all have. Once every month or so some bright spark gets it into their head that adding a “None of the above” option would be a brilliant idea. Unfortunately this month, we’ve got two of the buggers:

amend ballot papers and parliamentary procedure to allow and facilitate an individual the legal right to vote No Suitable Candidate on a UK ballot paper.

by Mr. C. Baker

The option to legitimately select No Suitable Candidate would be available for anyone eligible to vote in the United Kingdom. The object of voting No Suitable Candidate is to allow a true representation of public opinion whilst being constructive. Based on the principles of allowing the majority to make decisions effectively and efficiently, while ensuring fairness towards the minority, this voting option gives an individual the right to voice an opinion. In such a case where the No Suitable Candidate were to receive a majority of the vote cast a variety of formal procedures may be invoked which would include beginning the election process again with the original candidates excluded. The petition is made with No party agenda or political bias. Support is sought in the interest of treating the public fairly, especially by those that seek to govern us.

introduce in the forthcoming UK election, and for all future elections, a ‘Vote of no confidence’ box should be added to the ballot form/slip.

by Steven J. Grimwade

We the undersigned put forward the proposition that in the forthcoming UK election, and for all future elections, a ‘Vote of no confidence’ box should be introduced to the ballot form/slip. This would allow people who wish to exercise their right to vote but see no clear distinction between the existing parties, or just wish to voice their discontent at the current state of politics in this country, to register their democratic opinion. In the past various parties have blamed low turn-out to the voting polls on ‘public apathy’. This may not be the case. We believe the ‘Vote of no confidence’ box would remove this ambiguity, allowing the government a clearer perspective of the public’s changing attitudes, while also granting the hitherto silent voice of those wishing to abstain from voting for a particular party, to be heard.

Fucking Hell, people. Let me explain this to you so you can go back to watching Jeremy Kyle: Elections are not opinion polls. You are not being asked which of the candidates you like more than the others. You’re being asked to pick the candidate that you believe would be the least-worst at running the country. If you truly don’t want to vote for any of the candidates, you can simply stay home when the polls are open. That way you get to throw away your vote and stay in and watch Doctors.

And to the government’s ePetition admin team: What the bloody Hell are you doing? Your job is to make sure shit like this doesn’t happen. It’s bad enough you approve a petition like this once a month every month like clockwork, but to approve two near-identical petitions on the same day? What the fuck are the government paying you for? Do you know what your job is supposed to be? Does anybody know?

What a bunch of fucking rocket surgeons.

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