Posted by Ben @ August 31st, 2010 8:48 pm. Filed under: Batshit Mental Rants,Commas,Exclamation marks!!!!,I Am A Brain!,I Pay Taxes So You Have To Do Anything I Say,I'm Keeping The Whole Class Back,Is Research The Same Thing As Making Shit Up? Good.,It Says So In The Daily Mail,Not actual freedom -- just what I wanted. Which is basically the same thing.,Racism,Sorry, What Was I Talking About?,That's SO UNFAIR! I HATE YOU!,This Is The Worst Kind Of Discrimination! The Kind Against Me!,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,We're British, Dammit!,Work Around My Delusions Dammit!,Xenophobia,spelin an grammer — Tags: JANET —
cancel human rights law, and get out of this e.u monstrous mistake!!!!!!!Why the contribution is important
To give this country the freedom, and rewards, that the true British deserve. The “so called human rights, seem only to work for illegal immigrants, who are known terrorists, thieves, and gang members. You have only to watch documentaries, or read the national press to see what I mean. All the time, you can see “illegals” given housing, some of them, mansions, that cost thousands of pounds ,in the name of human rights. Benefits should only be paid to people who have paid into this country, i.e. tax, and national insurance . We are a laughing stock. The last government, (and I use the word government, loosly) cut funding to universities, so that HOME students only have very few places, the rest of the places, of which there is many, go to foreign students. Only if you are financially independent, can you get a place in university. Some-one I know of, gained the marks at college, which he was told, that last year, with those very same marks, he would have been able to gain access to university, but now, like the funding,every thing has been changed! The worst thing was, he was told ” It’s a pity you cant go to Africa, for three yearsbecause then, you could have come back to this(his own country of birth) as an overseas university student.
You can’t argue with that. You really can’t. Not because it’s accurate in any way, but because doing so is like volunteering to have your frontal lobe slowly sawn off with a piece of rusty barbed wire.
Posted by Ben @ August 29th, 2010 6:54 pm. Filed under: Racism,Thinking Things Through Is Just Not British,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,We're British, Dammit!,Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children? — Tags: dlee —
After spending a weekend in the Capital London, I was dissmayed to find no UK citizens working at any of the hotel, theatre, resturant, train and taxis we used. As so many of our own children are now leaving school, college and university and cannot get work at all. I would like to suggest that all uk companies be required to employ at least 70% British and 30% others. All companies with jobs in the UK should be supporting our economy this would get our young people into employment and reduce the numbers on benifits from families that have worked and paid into the system, Foreign students/ exchange yrs students should not be taking all the UK service industry jobs.Why the contribution is important
If all companies employing staff in the UK where to have to employ 70% british and maximum 30% others. This would eleviate the number of unemployed in the UK and give British students a start into industry. It would give british kids some self esteem back and hope for the future.
Translation: “I went into London and all the jobs were being done by dark-skinned people! This is a travesty!”
Posted by Ben @ May 1st, 2010 8:14 am. Filed under: Don't Worry About What THEY Want,I Find That Offensive!,It's Not Gay If Your Balls Don't Touch,Rejected Petitions,That's SO UNFAIR! I HATE YOU!,Unintentional Irony,Unreasonable Demands,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,What A Dick — Tags: david skinner —
by David skinner (rejected)Though in no way wishing to take away the liberty of homosexuals to access homosexual friendly guest houses, of which there are many, we believe that to force Mr and Mrs Wilkinson to conform to the tastes and lifestyle of homosexuals is discriminatory and is a blatant contradiction of the Equality Bill. Our British inheritance to be able to live and speak, according to our conscience, privately and in the public sphere, without harassment or the fear of civil or criminal penalty, is a freedom that once distinguished us from all other nations. This liberty did not come cheaply but cost the lives of our forebears and ancestors. Sadly today it is treated with such contempt by a government that continues to bind us in an ever growing cancerous growth of legislation.As people from all walks of life, political parties, religious faiths and none , but still broadly speaking, citizens of a Christian country, we the undersigned have joined together to stand foursquare with Mr and Mrs Wilkinson in defence of their beliefs and civil liberties.
There’s a sort-of wonderful, ignorant irony in David bringing up the Equality Bill when Mr and Mrs Wilkinson are sort-of contravening the Equality Bill themselves by forbidding homosexuals from using their establishment.
He obviously feels very strongly about this, considering he submitted this and two other near-identical petitions about this very subject. He seems to think that the ideals of people who believe in a magical space wizard are more important than the ideals of people who happen to be in love, irrespective of what their genders may be. In fact, looking at a previous petition of his we featured some time ago, he seems to think that religious ideals (specifically his ideals, which happen to be Christian) trump all other ideals, beliefs and lifestyles. For that reason, he is a cunt.
That’s not a word I use often. It’s not a word I even like using. I have a particular disdain for that word, but then I also have a disdain for people who think that their imaginary friend is more important than… well, than anything else. That makes him a cunt. He is a cunt. David Skinner, who is a cunt, is a cunt.
I honestly can’t understand how someone can think that their God, whom they believe in despite the lack of any evidence, is more important than the love between two people of the same gender, which they refuse to believe in despite the overwhelming evidence presented.
Posted by Ben @ April 8th, 2010 5:33 pm. Filed under: Meta-petitioning,Not Government Business,Reject Rednesday,Rejected Petitions,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,We're British, Dammit! — Tags: Kimberley Ackerley, Mathew Nottingham, Mr R Hook —
We’re running a day late, I know. But there were some lovely rejected petitions last night. Who am I to deny you a show?
by Kimberley Ackerley (rejected)Where jobs are available British workers should be given preference over EU immigrants. These EU immigrants should only be given the jobs if no British citizens are eligible or available to take up the positions. Agencies such as 24-7 recruitment which mainly sign Polish immigrants should not be able to procure the jobs available unless it is proven that there are no British citizens available for the jobs.
This petition was rejected because “This petition presents opinion as fact.” Marvellous! Shall I go on? (more…)
Posted by Ben @ March 31st, 2010 5:01 pm. Filed under: It's Not Gay If Your Balls Don't Touch,Oh Yeah? Let's See You Write A Better Petition!,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts — Tags: Steve Vince —
by Steve VinceThe wording of the petition should be self-explanatory.
Oh, it is. I’m sure you would’ve asked for the right to decline “people of colour” as well were it not for the fact that it’d make you sound even more ignorant than you already are.
Posted by Ben @ March 31st, 2010 4:57 pm. Filed under: We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,spelin an grammer — Tags: Alan Spearman —
by Alan Spearmanwhat gives diane thompson the right to sell the national lottery to a foriegn country. what happens to all the interest lying in the fund and the help for good causes. this should not be allowed
No, no, it’s alright. We still own Canadia. The Queen is on their money and everything. They have to do what we tell them to do.
Posted by Ben @ March 30th, 2010 5:38 pm. Filed under: I See What You Did There,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,What A Dick,spelin an grammer — Tags: V. Bennett —
V. Bennett hates foreigners. This much is apparent.
by V. BennettCharge for all interpreting and traslation services for foreign asylum seekers and immigrants to the U.K. The Government should withdraw the free service.
I could call V. names, or mock V.’s lack of class. I could do both of these things. And I will. V. Bennett, you’re a dick.
Posted by Ben @ March 24th, 2010 9:46 pm. Filed under: Democracy? Isn't That The One Where You Do Everything I Say?,Don't Worry About What THEY Want,Is Research The Same Thing As Making Shit Up? Good.,It Says So In The Daily Mail,Join the Fight Against Nebulous Bad-Sounding Things!,Racism,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,What A Dick,Xenophobia — Tags: Mr Garry Smith —
Garry Smith is a forward thinker. And by that I mean he looks at the future of the EU and thinks to himself, “It’s full of foreigners!”
And the notion of adding more foreigners to the ever-growing throng does not fill him with the warm fuzzies.
by Mr Garry SmithBlock Turkey entering into the EU. 1) Human rights in Turkey are not up to recognised EU standards and may never be despite any promises. Turkey has reluctantly agreed to end its death penalty in a bid to join the EU, but only in peacetime, and this is a country that has had to be forced to outlaw people smuggling to join the EU, it has had to be forced to outlaw this despicable act, it wouldn’t have outlawed it on its own. Turkey is not part of Europe, it is in the Middle East, and has its borders with Iraq, Iran & Syria, who next to join, Iraq or Iran or Syria or all 3? 2) The EU club is big enough and not one British citizen (except the PM) has ever been given the vote for this to happen 3) This will cause an influx of Turkish people to the UK as happened with Poland 4) The majority of British people do not want the EU any larger or Turkey to join it. 5) Its about time the PM went with the majority in his own country and not because it makes him look popular in Europe.
Ah, the “slippery slope” argument. “If Turkey get in, that means Iraq, Iran and Syria will all want to get in! At the same time! They’ll all get stuck in the door as they try to come through! It’ll be anarchy!”
Did Turkey have to be forced to stop capital punishment and bring in tougher laws against human trafficking? Maybe. Sometimes people need to have their arms twisted to do what is ultimately best for them. But to dismiss their entire worth as a nation because of it? To say that they may never reach EU standards? That’s an impressive piece of dickery, Mr. Smith.
Also, I hate the arrogance of assuming that every bloody thing that happens in Parliament or in the EU needs to be voted for by the British public. Personally, I’m overjoyed that “not one British citizen (except the PM) has ever been given the vote for this to happen”, or indeed for any other manner of thing to happen. If the British public were able to vote on every major thing to happen to the UK then they wouldn’t be part of the EU in the first place, nor would gay couples be able to have civil partnerships. Women probably wouldn’t be able to vote, either. And you know why? Because people like things the way they are. Oh yes, there are individuals and groups who rally for social change, but the masses are quite content to plod along in their uneventful little lives, going to their uninteresting jobs, eating their decidedly dull meals and watching their wholly bland but remarkably high-definition televisions.
But of course, this doesn’t have anything to do with any of those points, does it? It’s more to do with the fact that if Turkey gets into the EU Turkish citizens will be able to come and go from the UK as they please. They’ll be able to move here, seek employment, start businesses, own property, just like the Polish. And you don’t like the Polish, do you Mr. Smith? Oh no, of course not. They’re not local. They talk funny, and have strangely uniform haircuts, and eat pastries with odd names spelt with bizarre letters that look like they might be good, sturdy, British letters. But they’re not! And the worst thing about the Polish? They’re white. You can’t even identify them by sight. Anyone you know could be Polish. You could be living next door to a Pole right now and have absolutely no idea!
What this boils down to, Mr. Smith, is your deeply-rooted racism and distrust of anyone who isn’t from a town you can pinpoint on a map of the Great British Isles.
I’m just speculating, obviously.
Posted by Ben @ March 24th, 2010 6:00 pm. Filed under: "Making Britain Great Again",Exclamation marks!!!!,Gibberish,I AM TALKING!,Reject Rednesday,Rejected Petitions,This Is What We're Outraged At This Week,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,What Would Idiot-Jesus Do?,You Can't Spell "Spam" Without The PM,spelin an grammer — Tags: Christine Maloney, Dr. Arif Anwar, Keith Jones, miss nicole abernethy, mr.a1.sino.as.s"2".ir.soegihartonotonegoro, Teresa Wright (and her best buddy Jesus) —
Have you ever played The Sims? The people in the game have their own language called Simlish. It’s more or less nonsense words and phrases, a loose string of vaguely French- and Spanish-sounding words hewn together with no real structure, rhyme, or reason.
It also makes much, much more sense than this petition which was, if the name is any indication, submitted by a glitch Pokémon.
by mr.a1.sino.as.s”2″.ir.soegihartonotonegoro,st of swissindo world trust international orbit – nuk/nkri (rejected)to executed, to press release declaration of transaction,” the great freedom “,global immunity owner money world – collateral 2. milliard. 678. 000. 000. mt. 400. kg, on the world bank. clearance program ubs. world bank us$.920. 000. 000. 000. 000. 000,-.To act. bullion big bank ratu mas kencana room a1-1a , new currency N$2. 1. 840. 000. 000. 000. 000. 000,- new grant poundsterling – us dollar – euro. swissindo world trust international orbit.to act.office the great president – big top head quarters united Nations integrated, big top president board of governor ubs. world bank. fed fed. bi, assayers & refiners London azl 18 us/as.1344 – id micro film, dewan ikatan document of internatinal, code 99. 98 series 4 assets , one personal only ,the big top owner legally corporates & institutions : sumber bina Graha 12 istaini agung ngesti tunggal, nuk.nkri-pkc.caraka – owner 101. aster – nasa. trusty prasasty dinasty national international induk army. induk bank. induk negara. badan induk – induk Dunia pusat commando agung system kekuasaan dunia, badan induk lembaga tinggi tertinggi negara bangsa ( lttb. lttn )aae.a2 ina ; 117. 113. 112.itj- icj. k.h.k – flo.
Sounds like an encrypted transmission sent to the La-Li-Lu-Le-Lo. What else have you got for us, Reject Rednesday? (more…)
Posted by Ben @ March 23rd, 2010 8:01 pm. Filed under: I AM TALKING!,Rejected Petitions,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,What Would Idiot-Jesus Do?,Xenophobia,You and What Army? — Tags: Rev Denis G Beedie —
Have you met Reverend Denis G Beedie? No? Nor have I, and I hope to keep it that way. I’ve found six rejected petitions of his on the ePetition site archive, but rather than list them in order let’s start with this one:
by Rev Denis G Beedie (rejected)UAF are consistently showing a thug-like, aggressive and virulent anti-democratic attitude towards British citizens such as members and supporters of the peaceful English Defence League, the Welsh Defence League and the Scottish Defence League who seek to retain our ancient British Culture and Heritage and prevent It`s overwhelming by forces unpatriotic to our Monarch, Parliament and Nation
The petition was rejected, quite understandably, for containing “potentially libellous, false, or defamatory statements”. But then Beedie decided to submit this petition:
by Rev. Denis G Beedie (rejected)UAF are consistently showing a thug-like, aggressive and virulent anti-democratic attitude towards British citizens such as members and supporters of the peaceful English Defence League, the Welsh Defence League and the Scottish Defence League who seek to retain our ancient British Judeo/Chrisian Culture and Heritage and prevent It`s overwhelming by forces unpatriotic to our Monarch, Parliament and Nation. This earlier Petition was rejected by Govt-Minders for the following reason(s):Petition Rejected This petition has been rejected because: It contained potentially libellous, false, or defamatory statements. Will the Prime Minister, in the light of recent thuggish and violent behaviour by the UAF at Bolton now acknowledge that Rev Denis G Beedie was declaring the truth in his said Petition and is the P.M now willing to offer an apology to the said Rev Denis G Beedie for the defamatory statement(s) made regarding Rev Denis G Beedie and his earlier Petition?
Oh dear. Not a happy bunny, is he? He’s out of luck though, because this petition was rejected as well. Let’s see what else he’s posted.
(more…)
Posted by Ben @ March 17th, 2010 7:40 pm. Filed under: Racism,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts,We're ENGLISH not British! — Tags: Andrew Constantine —
by Andrew ConstantineTo effect this change, the government needs to amend the Town and Country Planning (Control of Advertisements) (England) Regulations 2007 so as to allow our White Dragon flag to be flown in England without our having to secure planning permission.
Would you kindly fuck off?
Posted by Ben @ February 26th, 2010 6:15 am. Filed under: Racism,Rejected Petitions,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts — Tags: Keith Jones —
by keith jones of taxpaying pensioner with a wish not to be killed by a foreigner being kept here solely to protect people who live in his home country, from being killed by him (rejected)Anybody who needs an explanation or elucidation of the point of this petition really ought to get on a plane to a Islamic country!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA