Posted by Ben @ November 23rd, 2009 10:47 pm. Filed under: Clearly You've Thought This Through,That'd Be Nice — Tags: Miss Frances Merry —
by Miss Frances MerryI think that every last Friday in the month should be a public holiday because it will be good for every one who works, and all school children. It will give everyone something to look forward to!
And, of course, it’ll have no serious repercussions on the economy whatsoever!
Posted by Ben @ November 18th, 2009 1:47 am. Filed under: I'm a Voter So You Have To Do Anything I Say,I'm serious!,So I Just Type What I Want Here And The PM Has To Do It?,That'd Be Nice,Unworkable Ideas,Work Around My Delusions Dammit!,You and What Army? — Tags: Andrew Bradshaw of Private Sector —
by Andrew Bradshaw of Private SectorThe Prime Minister should attend every funeral and honour those men and women who have given their life for the decisions made by him and show respect for their bravery
This is a logistical nightmare at best, and an impractical impossibility at… well, at all. If nothing else, who’d be left to run the wotsit? Thingy, you know… the country?
Posted by Ben @ November 18th, 2009 1:34 am. Filed under: That'd Be Nice,Unworkable Ideas,What A Load Of Bankers — Tags: Hamish Scott —
by Hamish ScottAll banks should be shut down, and the current monetary system replaced with debt free money backed up by gold and/or other metals and minerals. People would no longer be slaves to the banks through the debt created by money.
You can’t have money without debt, you clown. There’s always going to be someone who owes someone else something.
Posted by Ben @ November 11th, 2009 4:07 am. Filed under: I AM TALKING!,I Have A Sense Of Perspective: Problems That Are Far Away Appear Small To Me.,I Pay Taxes So You Have To Do Anything I Say,Presumably The Prime Minister Is Not Too Busy,Reject Rednesday,Rejected Petitions,spelin an grammer,That'd Be Nice,The Nasty Television Upset Me!,What A Dick,What A Load Of Bankers,Young, Dumb, And Online — Tags: James Harris, Jonathan Hall, kennerz of kennerz, Kimberley Petts of Fareham college, Ms S Winter-Smith, Theresa —
It’s Wednesday, and that means it’s time to pick at the Reject Bin and see what the British Government had too much common sense to allow the public to sign.
by Jonathan Hall (rejected)This elite ninja force (which should be named NINJA: National Interest Ninja Japanese-y Awesomeness) would take on most of the killing people-type jobs the armed forces have to do so they could concentrate on shouting at people.
I believe this would greatly reduce the government’s spending on defence, thus freeing up more money for education and health.
Brilliant.
(more…)
Posted by Ben @ October 17th, 2009 6:48 am. Filed under: A Rose By Any Other Name Would Be Less Funny,Join the Fight Against Nebulous Bad-Sounding Things!,Presumably The Prime Minister Is Not Too Busy,That'd Be Nice,These Kids Today With Their Modern Haircuts And Hippetty-Hop Music,Unworkable Ideas — Tags: Mr. Michael Penelope Williams of Reddish Vale Technology College —
by Mr. Michael Penelope Williams of Reddish Vale Technology CollegeVandalism is on the increase in schools, and we believe that something should be done about it. Do you think the government is doing enough?
Well short of having police officers standing by every single desk, wall and otherwise blank surface in every college, university, school and nursery across the UK, what exactly is it you would like the Government to do? You can’t just make blanket statements like “Stop this thing that we can probably all agree is pretty much not on but is, let’s not kid ourselves, pretty damned difficult to curtail” and expect that to fix everything.
And he’s a teacher, too. My word. What’s wrong with him? I wonder if he went into College the next day and told his students, “Right, well, I hope you’ve enjoyed writing on my desks and tippexing rude words onto my classroom walls, because last night I sent a message to Prime Minister of Parliament Gordon Brown and I expect he’ll be doing something about it any day now. So watch it
Posted by Ben @ October 1st, 2009 10:01 pm. Filed under: "Making Britain Great Again",spelin an grammer,That'd Be Nice,Thinking Things Through Is Just Not British,You Know - We Haven't Banned Anything Lately. — Tags: Mr. Lucio Milisci of Lucio Milisci —
by Mr. Lucio Milisci of Lucio MilisciThis petition is aimed at banning parking penalties and car clamping from the United Kingdom. Suggested alternatives are points on the driving licenses or use more the technology and human resources available to educate drivers with their parking habits. Parking fines and car clamping (and its related enormous charges) cause too much grievance to the population at a time when we need to pull together to make this country Great again.
There is so much wrong with this plan. For a start, “points on the driving licenses”? Generally when a car is parked there’s no one in it – who, then, should the points be given to? You can’t prove who was driving the car at the time it was parked, and you can’t put points on the licenses of everyone insured on that car because then… well, people’d moan.
Secondly, “use more the technology”? Really?
Finally, the solution to your predicament is this: Don’t park where you’re not supposed to, you fucking plum.
Posted by Ben @ October 1st, 2009 1:53 am. Filed under: Genius!,Just Crazy Enough To Work,spelin an grammer,That'd Be Nice — Tags: James Mellor —
by James Mellorwhy don’t we make all cigarette packets have to be pink, imagine every bloke who smokes having to open a pink box every time he wants a smoke… talk about embarrassing, and this will slowly change the image of smoking to be very uncool, blokes who hundle in groups smoking cancer sticks from bright pink little boxes!
I used to smoke for 8 years but gave up over 9 years ago now, I never wanted to smoke in the first place but a friend got me hooked when I was 16.
If all packets are bright pink then I would definately never want to start smoking and if I already smoked I’d definately want to quick real fast so should work a treat.
Cheers, James Mellor – London
Posted by Ben @ September 23rd, 2009 6:56 pm. Filed under: Everyone Stop What You're Doing Because You're Mildly Inconveniencing Me,I Could've Looked This Up But Instead I Watched Countdown,I Deserve Free Money!,Lies Damn Lies And Nonsense Statistics,That'd Be Nice,Unreasonable Demands — Tags: Mr Toby Ratcliffe —
by Mr Toby RatcliffeStatistics say that women are better drivers as they are more careful and more considerate drivers than men. In the not so distant past men and women have fought for equality between the sexes and races, and now car insurance companies are hiding behind their statistics that are seen to be sexist in the eyes of equality protesters. All everybody wants is to be equal between each other and no company or corporation should be able to hide behind any statistics that judge you on your gender or what colour your skin is, and so this is why I believe that insurance companies should create equal costs for car insurance for men and women.
I’m a 23 year-old male. You know how expensive car insurance is for me? It’s not cheap, I’ll tell you that much. That’s the nature of car insurance – the young pay more than the old, the men pay more than the women. If you’re in a demographic which is statistically more likely to get in an accident then, well, you’re going to pay more for your insurance. Stop your whining, and stop trying to force sexism in a place where it doesn’t belong.
Posted by Ben @ September 10th, 2009 10:51 pm. Filed under: I Am A Brain!,Just Crazy Enough To Work,Presumably The Prime Minister Is Not Too Busy,That'd Be Nice — Tags: Mr Michael Dray —
NHS staff should be given incentives to highlight waste however large or small and action taken to eliminate that waste. Incentives could be in the form of points that would be redeemable against gifts in a catalogue.
That’s it! A gift catalogue! Because, y’know, it’s not like it’s their fucking job to ensure that hospitals are a healthy, sterile environment!
Also, can we stop calling an active attempt to reduce or stop a negative activity a War on Things? It’s getting kind of stale.
Posted by Ben @ August 3rd, 2009 9:26 pm. Filed under: It's Just A Little Request...,Not Government Business,Presumably The Prime Minister Is Not Too Busy,Stand Back! I'm Going To Try SCIENCE!,That'd Be Nice — Tags: Jacqueline Harrison —
We are asking Gordon Brown and the British Government to abstain from eating meat at least one day a week to make a positive impact on the health of not only themselves but also the planet. The world’s leading authority on global warming Dr Rajendra Pachauri says that people should have one meat-free day a week if they want to make a personal and effective sacrifice to help tackle climate change before going on to reduce their meat consumption even further. UN data shows that meat production and consumption are to blame for 18% of greenhouse gases – more than cars. Imagine how much CO2 could be saved if the British public – led by the government – committed to reducing the amount of meat they eat. We want the British government to become pioneers in the fight against obesity and global warming by eating more vegetables to help to save the planet.
Well he can ask, but I’m jolly sure I know what the answer will be.
Posted by Ben @ July 30th, 2009 5:36 pm. Filed under: Anything I Want Should Be Mandatory,Duplicate Petitions,That'd Be Nice — Tags: Antony Hurd —
Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest, but workers are increasingly finding that employers are changing contracts which includes Sunday working.
Hey, guys! Guys! Listen to this: “Antony Turd”! Hahahahahahaha! I know, good isn’t it? I just thought of it. It’s funny because he’s a narrow-minded little turd who refuses to lives in the 21st century!
Posted by Ben @ July 28th, 2009 7:39 am. Filed under: So I Just Type What I Want Here And The PM Has To Do It?,That'd Be Nice,Unreasonable Demands — Tags: jim macbeth —
There is a spare plinth in Trafalgar Square and it would be a fitting tribute to those who gave so much in World War one if it was used to house a statue of Harry Patch the final British Citizen who fought in this conflict.
I don’t understand why Harry Patch should get any sort of special memorial simply because he had the good fortune of being able to not die longer than the other World War I veterans.
