Posted by Ben @ July 14th, 2010 9:18 pm. Filed under: "Making Britain Great Again",A Rose By Any Other Name Would Be Less Funny,Are You Kidding? We Can't Afford That!,Only joking!,Please State The Nature of the Medical Emergency,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,What A Dick,Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children? —
I’m fairly confident this one is a joke petition but here it is anyway, presented without comment:
Like the title suggests. Just don’t pay anything for a year. On anything. Public spending for the fiscal year 2008–09 was £618.6 billion. Stop spending it. Yes, it’ll hurt in the short term (for about a year) but then the United Kingdom will emerge as an economic powerhouse, ready to weather any financial storm in the future.How the idea could be implemented
Make all public sector workers redundant and hire them back a year later when they’re despearate for work at a reduced rate. Obviously, we’ll have to make do with houses remaining on fire if ignited (which should help to keep the elderly warm in the winter and help stimulate the housing construction industry).Cancel all NHS operations and reschedule a year later (would anyone actually notice given the waiting lists? It will also give doctors a chance to read up on how to run hospitals now that they have to do that as well as keep people alive).
Give every child a gap year. Before, such a luxury was only ever afforded to the children of middle/upper class people as they went off to find themselves (or relive a scene from The Beach).
Keep all prisoners locked up in their luxury appartments. The one remaining at the end of the year will be awarded a pardon and a games console. (A small price to pay for keeping the prison population down). It’d be a return to good old fasioned values of survival.
All people on benefits to have housing benefit stopped. They’ll loose their homes, thus creating more affordable housing for the returning public sector workers next year, and what doesn’t kill them will make them stronger (although it will most certainly result in death for most of them).
Stop taking away people’s rubbish. If no one removes it, then there’s no one there to fine you if your bin’s a little full. That’ll be an easy sell to a lot of people that view this as a life-or-death matter.
This isn’t going to be popular for everyone, but with a bit of grit, determination and a lot of personal wealth, we’ll pull through this as one. It may even foster the ‘Blitz’ spirit that helped define us as a nation all those years ago.
Posted by Ben @ July 14th, 2010 8:58 pm. Filed under: Abolish This!,Anything I Want Is A Human Right,Batshit Mental Rants,Clearly You've Thought This Through,Don't Worry About What THEY Want,Duplicate Petitions,Hanging's Too Good For 'Em!,Is Research The Same Thing As Making Shit Up? Good.,Please State The Nature of the Medical Emergency,Sexism,Stand Back! I'm Going To Try SCIENCE!,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,Unreasonable Demands,What A Dick,Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children?,You Know - We Haven't Banned Anything Lately. — Tags: AndyCC, ngreer —
Abortion. Touchy subject. Touchy enough for at least two petitions on YourFreedom.
Someone decides to have sex, they should live with the concequences. Abortion should be banned for all social economic reasons.Life is a sacred thing, whether you believe it is from God or not, people these days think that you just pop-out of the womb on the day you are born, but it starts before that within the womb.
If people disagree with banning Abortion for social economic reasons, could they please explain why it is differnt to killing a 5 year old because they are not an Adult yet?
Abortion is just legalised mass murder, wrapped up to make everyone feel good about it.
Why the contribution is important
Why should an innocent unborn child be murdered simply because of a “bad” choice to have sex?Why should the taxpayer pay for this? And for the clumsy decisions of others not to use protection?
Why the contribution is important
The right to life is a fundamental human right. The unborn are human. At the moment of conception they become, by any reasonable definition, human. They are genetically members of the species homo sapiens, and between that moment and birth, there is no clear dividing line when a change occurs. If there is no clear dividing line, then no change occurs (if it is illegal to kill at some precise moment and not before, that must be because a significant change occurs at that moment).It follows that to kill the unborn is murder, and the clear denial of that unborn child’s right to life. We will not execute murderers and rapists because of this principle, but we will inflict a particularly brutal killing on defenceless, innocent children. This is unnacceptable in any society that aspires to be civilised.
let’s ignore all of the bollocks pseudo-science and half-arsed presumptions in these petitions and jump to the crux of the matter: making abortion illegal.
What about where protection is used? What about rape? What about incest rape? What about instances where the baby won’t survive childbirth? What about instances where the mother won’t survive childbirth? What about where the baby will be born without a brain? Or, rather simply, what if the woman simply isn’t ready to be a mother? It’s her body, her choice, and she shouldn’t be forced into motherhood against her will, be it because she was attacked in the park or because she just doesn’t want to have kids.
Even taking all of these variables out of the picture, making abortion illegal isn’t going to help. The women that want abortions are still going to find ways of getting them, being it going abroad to somewhere else in Europe where it’s still legal. Or, if that’s not an option, they’ll seek out a “back alley abortion” where statistics show they will, in fact, wind up dead.
So, long story short, it seems AndyCC and ngreer hate women, they don’t think a woman is entitled to ownership of her own uterus.
Posted by Ben @ April 22nd, 2010 3:05 am. Filed under: Duplicate Petitions,Rejected Petitions,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,Thinking Things Through Is Just Not British,Unintentional Irony,What Have Other People Ever Done For Me?,spelin an grammer — Tags: sandra john —
by sandra john (rejected)spend the money in britain and lower taxes thus increasing our stanard of living and helping the economy.
Why don’t people in the UK get foreign aid, eh Gordon? It’s discrimination is what it is.
Posted by Ben @ April 15th, 2010 6:09 am. Filed under: Exclamation marks!!!!,Just Like That!,Rejected Petitions,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children?,spelin an grammer — Tags: Miss Amy Oddy —
by Miss Amy Oddy (rejected)Mps have time to do tv programmes etc & spend taxpayers money on whatever they please. Someone needs to set up a centre were researchers trawl the internet for websites/groups/people that find and remove all things with that content may it be pictures or words. Pay the researchers with the money thats wasted instead of on expenses!!!
Bonus Points: casual dismissal of expenses as a waste, planting this petition firmly in “Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don’t Understand” territory.
Posted by Ben @ April 4th, 2010 7:37 pm. Filed under: Are You Kidding? We Can't Afford That!,Clearly You've Thought This Through,I AM TALKING!,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,spelin an grammer — Tags: christina aston —
by christina astonWe should not be paying Billions of our money into the corrupt eu when we are actually getting to a state of bankruptcy. The eu should have a maximum of 1 million from all the countries that are joined to it. If the eu cannot manage on this vast amount of money then like most of us they will have to cut their cloth and make ends meet. The eu was for free trade within europe NOT for total control over the peoples within Europe. This is now another gravy train which is quickly getting out of hand and needs to be stopped in its track.
Posted by Ben @ January 26th, 2010 8:33 pm. Filed under: Abolish This!,Everything MPs Have Is Part Of The Expenses Scandal,Nothing Should Ever Change!,So I Just Type What I Want Here And The PM Has To Do It?,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,This was Yesterday's News Ages Ago,spelin an grammer — Tags: Mr Robert Philp —
This is quite possibly the greatest misunderstanding of how MPs are paid I’ve ever seen in my life:
by Mr Robert PhilpMP’s to have a wage just like everyone else. No second home and all expenses to be audited by independent auditors and a committee made up of members of the public
Posted by Ben @ January 12th, 2010 9:27 pm. Filed under: I AM TALKING!,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,The Nasty Television Upset Me!,spelin an grammer — Tags: Jim Coote —
by Jim CooteMr Brown and all other government deparments/quangos – please stop wasting taxpayers cash on pointless TV and radio adverting.
Yeah! Stop using a medium almost everybody has immediate access to as a method of telling us things!
Posted by Ben @ January 6th, 2010 9:04 pm. Filed under: I'm serious!,Oh Yeah? Let's See You Write A Better Petition!,Please State The Nature of the Medical Emergency,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,This Is What We're Outraged At This Week — Tags: Robin Carvell —
by Robin CarvellThis petition is an effort to block the nationwide implementation of full body scanners that represent a total violation of privacy, a health risk, and tyranny. Forcing people to pose for naked photos is a crime. If the government does this it will be a criminal government. If the body scanners are allowed to be implemented travelers will be forced to do worse things under the threat of being treated as a terrorist if they refuse the violation of their dignity and freedom. Professors of Molecular and Cell Biology maintain that there is no safe dose of ionizing radiation. In addition to these issues, full body scanners would not even have stopped the Christmas Day bomber from boarding Flight 253, according to a British MP who helped design the machines. “I must advise the Prime Minister – and the British public – that the scanners are not a “silver bullet,” said Ben Wallace, who worked on the scanners at defense research organization QinetiQ. “You would be mistaken to think that they would counter the new threat.”
There are a number of good reasons to be against the Body Scanners being installed at airports – and one or two of them even make it into this petition – but it amuses me that Robin seems to believe that airport passengers will have to “pose for naked photos”, as though this were a nude photo shoot of some sort.
Posted by Andrew @ December 26th, 2009 10:47 pm. Filed under: Rejected Petitions,Stand Back! I'm Going To Try SCIENCE!,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand. — Tags: Mr Keith Norton —
by Mr Keith Norton (rejected)With the repair of the Hadron Collider C.E.R.N, scientists are about to try to recreate the circumstances of the Big Bang. This may leap foreward our knowledge of the universe and create benefits for mankind or, as some scientists believe, end in catastrophe for life. Such Risks should not be left to the scientists’ thirst for knowledge. Scientists make mistakes in their methodology and criteria. There should be much wider debate that the citizen is aware of the risks and be able to effect whether they should be taken. This is not the equivalent of the Luddite destruction of the Spinning Jenny. Scientists such as those at C.E.R.N. are searching for knowledge that they do not have. What if the results are not as they expect?
Good idea! Let’s have a public debate about quantum mechanics. That will be productive.
Posted by Ben @ December 23rd, 2009 7:08 pm. Filed under: Abolish This!,Can't someone else pay the tax?,Clearly You've Thought This Through,I Could've Looked This Up But Instead I Watched Countdown,Is Research The Same Thing As Making Shit Up? Good.,It Says So In The Daily Mail,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,Thank You For Coming -- It's Been Very Useful,That's SO UNFAIR! I HATE YOU!,The Nasty Television Upset Me!,There's Already A Solution But Don't Let That Stop You From Bothering The PM,This Is The Worst Kind Of Discrimination! The Kind Against Me!,Unreasonable Demands,spelin an grammer — Tags: Mr Richard Moore —
Oh dear, we have another “scrap the TV license” moron in our midsts. And this one is armed with misinformation! Let’s get this over with…
by Mr Richard MooreWhy should the BBC be given free money, whilst other TV channels gain no funding from the BBC TV License?
Why also is it satisfactory for the BBC to outsourse it’s published programs to e.g. BBC Americas for viewing abroad.
Why also is it satisfactory for the BBC to use UK License holders money to spurn products for their own profit from the UK public, i.e. childrens toy product etc…?
With the current economic state the country has been placed into, would it not enable families with a lower income to utilise the monies used for a TV License on more benificial items, i.e. feeding their family?
Is it not fair to the other broadcast network’s such as ITV, Channel 4 etc… to not recieve monies from the TV License.
Support the scrappage of the BBC TV License, sign the petition!
Okay, let’s dissect this one, shall we?
Why should the BBC be given free money, whilst other TV channels gain no funding from the BBC TV License?
Because the BBC is a public broadcasting service, and ITV, Channel 4, Channel Five, Sky etc. are businesses supported by advertising.
Why also is it satisfactory for the BBC to outsourse it’s published programs to e.g. BBC Americas for viewing abroad.
Actually, haha, they don’t. What happens is this: BBC Worldwide, the business arm of the BBC, is given the rights to distribute the shows to other territories. What happens then is that BBC America has to bid for those rights, and if they succeed then they get the show. You probably don’t know this but until recently BBC America didn’t have the first-to-air rights to Doctor Who – the American SciFi Channel (now called SyFy) outbid them for the rights to series one through four, and they let those rights lapse this year for the one-off specials.
Additionally, BBC America (which, I need to reiterate, is a business much like ITV and British Sky Broadcasting) actually co-funds some BBC productions such as Robin Hood.
So, y’know. Research.
Why also is it satisfactory for the BBC to use UK License holders money to spurn products for their own profit from the UK public, i.e. childrens toy product etc…?
Again, this is stuff that is all handled by the BBC’s business arms and is not funded by the money they get from the TV license, you frog’s gusset.
With the current economic state the country has been placed into, would it not enable families with a lower income to utilise the monies used for a TV License on more benificial items, i.e. feeding their family?
Considering that television is a luxury item and not a utility, they could always put the TV in the loft if they can’t afford their license.
Is it not fair to the other broadcast network’s such as ITV, Channel 4 etc… to not recieve monies from the TV License.
There is some debate about this, but once again it’s worth noting that ITV, Channel 4 etc. are supported by advertising. The BBC is not.
Thanks for playing.
Posted by Ben @ December 21st, 2009 4:44 pm. Filed under: Don't Worry About What THEY Want,Exclamation marks!!!!,I Have A Sense Of Perspective: Problems That Are Far Away Appear Small To Me.,It Says So In The Daily Mail,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand.,Work Around My Delusions Dammit! — Tags: Colin Moss —
by Colin MossThe UK is in dire financial straights & the Prime Minister has the audacity to pledge 1.5 Billion pounds of the UK’s tax payer money to fund poorer countries climate change policies. The population of the UK is suffering enough & will continue to suffer for many years to come because of the bankrupt state that the government has got this country into, & the UK cannot afford to donate any more funds to countries outside the UK. The priority of this government should be to get the UK economy back on track before pledging funds that we do not have. Any rational & sensible government would control this irresponsible expenditure & ensure that UK takes priority. You cannot spend your way out of debt in this manner otherwise we will be in the mire even further than we are now. You, Your children, Your Grand Children & probably Great Grand Children will be paying the countries debt off due to the insane decisions like this donation made in your name by this government. Stop them now. Oh & just by coincidence the government has stripped 1.5 Billion Pounds from the defence budget !!!!!
Yeah! Fuck the climate! What did it ever do for us?
Posted by Ben @ November 23rd, 2009 11:31 pm. Filed under: ...Or Else!,Batshit Mental Rants,I Am A Brain!,I'm serious!,OH SNAP!,Stop Spending My Money On Things I Don't Understand. — Tags: Derek Green of Common sense —
There’s a lot of stupid in this petition, but rather than make a snarky comment about it I’ll just let it speak for itself.
by Derek Green of Common senseI understand from the TPA that the government is now responsible for 50% of radio advertising revenue and, as a regular listener, I find most of this is pointless and futile. For instance, the current one about “benefit thieves” (doesn’t seem to be one for parliamentary expenses thieves, but there you go). Most people on benefits are honest people who find themselves having to claim them after years of paying into the system. When they then find themselves asked to survive on a measly £60 a week, who could blame them for doing a bit of work on the side? Those who are the scroungers and know how to work the system are running rings round the establishment and do you honestly think a radio ad is going to prick their conscience? All it is, is another empty gesture to give the impression that the government is doing something about the problem. It’s time to stop this waste of money, especially when they’ve just refused funding for another drug that would give cancer sufferers longer with their loved ones. They need to wake up and realise which areas they do need to cut back on expense. Please sign this and stop this waste of money on what is more or less propaganda.