Posted by Ben @ April 21st, 2010 2:12 am. Filed under: Hanging's Too Good For 'Em!,I AM TALKING!,I'm Keeping The Whole Class Back,Presumably The Prime Minister Is Not Too Busy,Reject Rednesday,Rejected Petitions,The Nasty Television Upset Me!,Thinking Things Through Is Just Not British,What A Load Of Bankers — Tags: Aleksands Halamins, Keith Jones, Mrs Theresa Thomas —
Have a petition. Hey, I’m feeling generous – have three.
by Aleksands Halamins (rejected)I am sick and tired of teachers using “sick pay” advantages not to come and teach at school. Moreover, we as a taxpayer finance these sick off days and instead we have to pay the supply teacher as well as the teacher who is “ill”. Making most state school teachers self-employed will make them realize that that’s the way it goes: if you don’t come to school to teach – you wont get paid, as simple as that! Making the teachers self-employed will have its own disadvantages, however as a self-employed you will pay less tax and also you could make claims. Making the teachers self-employed will improve their attendance. Furthermore, this decision will 100% improve education in BRITAIN!
Yeah! Teachers don’t come to school at all! All they do is lounge about at home watching Diagnosis Murder and raking in the cash. This’ll teach ‘em.
by keith jones of taxpaying pensioner with no political nor religious affiliation (rejected)Gordon Brown has created the worst financial situation in the history of people living on this island. There has to be some merit in considering what horrendous fate should befall somebody who has done more damage to this country than any other single person, living or dead.
Keith Jones there, politely asking the government to think about cutting Gordon Brown’s head off.
by Mrs Theresa Thomas (rejected)This is an official petition to have Frankie Boyle return to the quiz show ‘Mock The Week’. Frankie is an asset to the quiz show and British lives are not the same with out him.
The government have officially rejected your official petition, because it’s officially crap.
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Of course not. They’re all fat and wear hoodies anyway. A bit of TB’ll skinny ‘em up a bit. Never did me any harm, aside from the days when I coughs up me own bodyweight in blood and phlegm.
What we really need, of course, is for those same ill teachers to be given leave to cane unruly pupils for being…uh…unruly, just as they had in the good old days when Britain was great, what ho!
*quietly removes the top hat and monacle*
Wait, Frankie Boyle has left ‘Mock the Week’? Now who will make the horribly racist jokes?
Not that it’s a particularly rare name in South Wales. But, this may be the same Keith Jones who as announced as BNP candidate for Newport East.
His earlier petition that ends with the phrase,”just like any other Muslim country”, in reference to the UK, would suggest a connection.
That, and the fact that he’s a batshit mentalist.
You know, I think it might be. We know he lives in South Wales, we know he’s very strongly anti-foreigners and we know he’s petitioned for the deposit required to stand for Parliament to be abolished.
The Downing Street website is down at the moment but rest assured that when it’s not I will investigate.
[...] a comment posted on this site last night, I’ve done a little digging on Keith Jones. I’ve looked through 141 of his old [...]
Andrew reckons:
There aren’t any potential unforseen negative consequences of encouraging ill people to stand in front of rooms of children, are there?
I shouldn’t think so, anyway.
April 21, 2010 at 10:31 am