In view of the fact that no, no.

Posted by Andrew @ February 27th, 2010 4:08 pm. Filed under: Rejected Petitions,Stand Back! I'm Going To Try SCIENCE! —

abolish all taxes introduced to combat "Global Warming".

by Mr. Robin A. Flood (rejected)

In view of the fact that the scientific evidence for ‘Global Warming’ has been compromised at the least and refuted completely at the most, and that it is unproven that human beings are in any way responsible for climate change, to ask the Prime Minister to abolish all taxes introduced to combat "global warming".

This was rejected for containing false information. Fair enough, but I put it to you that it also contains a false name.

Comments (2)

You Just Lost The Same.

Posted by Andrew @ February 26th, 2010 11:51 pm. Filed under: Rejected Petitions,We The Undersigned Just Lost The Game. — Tags: Mr Philip Ford —

End The Game Once And For All.

by Mr Philip Ford (rejected)

As you may be aware, there is a game that has swept the nation. to think of the game is to lose the game, and the fustrating results of this can be seen countrywide. The only way the game can end is for the current UK Prime Minister to announce on live TV, that the game is over. So please, sign up for this petition, and end the game once and for all!

This was rejected as an attempt at humour, but I’m less sure because

Announce to Britain the Game is up.

by Marcus James Moody (rejected)

It has come to our attention that the cessation of “the Game” shall only come into effect once the prime minister announces this on national television… As foretold by the prophecy handed down to us throughout the ages by the nameless ones.
Until then the disruption and frustration of near certain loss shall continue.

(We’ve linked to Moody’s petition before.)

Comments (4)

Oh Snap

Posted by Ben @ February 26th, 2010 6:25 am. Filed under: I AM TALKING!,Rejected Petitions,The PM Is The Bloke Who Runs The Football Right?,spelin an grammer — Tags: Billy Roberts of fight for united —

GLAZER OUT.

by Billy Roberts of fight for united (rejected)

this petition is on behalf of all manchester united supporters to try get malcolm glazer out of manchester united football club as he has bought the club with borrowed money which leaves the club having to pay massive interest rates talks of selling old trafford and the carrington training complex and its only time before we have to sell our best players somethig has to be done and fast GLAZER OUT LUHG

It’s funny if you read “GLAZER OUT” in the voice of Cole from Scrubs season nine. “Glazer… owtt!“

Comments (1)

I Never Give You My Number / I Only Give You My Situation

Posted by Ben @ February 26th, 2010 6:20 am. Filed under: Rejected Petitions,That'd Be Nice — Tags: Anne Wollenberg —

put a phone number on the e-petitions website so people can get help when they need it.

by Anne Wollenberg (rejected)

I need to speak to someone about the fact some bright spark has signed my petition (not this one, clearly) twice, which isn’t OK – I need to get it removed. Can I find a phone number? No. Can the PM’s office switchboard help? No. Do you answer emails or tweets? No. Could you please provide some way of accessing technical help?! I don’t want to start a petition for this, it’s just the only way I can think of to contact you that I haven’t already tried! The actual petition is at http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/selfemployedNI/ and the person who signed it twice is

# Mrs Carole Anne Benton # Mrs Carole Benton

Oh yes, please do put a phone number on the ePetition website. I’d love for the ePetition Team to actually hear what some of these people sound like. I imagine Keith Jones would never get off the line.

Comments (0)

Boom Bang A Bang

Posted by Ben @ February 26th, 2010 6:15 am. Filed under: Racism,Rejected Petitions,We Don't Take Kindly To Your Type Rahnd These Pahts — Tags: Keith Jones —

explain to the electorate of this country, in a public statement, why it is acceptable for an Iraqi citizen who would be a danger to the people of Iraq to be kept in this country (without asking him if he wants to go home to Iraq) where he will be a threat to the people who are paying for his existence without being given an opportunity NOT to pay for him to be kept alive.

by keith jones of taxpaying pensioner with a wish not to be killed by a foreigner being kept here solely to protect people who live in his home country, from being killed by him (rejected)

Anybody who needs an explanation or elucidation of the point of this petition really ought to get on a plane to a Islamic country!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Comments (0)

Christ Especially Loves What They’ve Done With The South Bank Lately

Posted by Andrew @ February 25th, 2010 3:07 pm. Filed under: Rejected Petitions,What Would Idiot-Jesus Do? — Tags: Christine Jones of Christ Loves UK & Christ Loves London —

Calling for our Prime Minster to set up examples of acknowledging the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ in the UK.

by Christine Jones of Christ Loves UK & Christ Loves London (rejected)

Christ Loves UK is petitioning for our leaders (especially the Prime Minister and the leaders of the other Parties) to set up examples of (1) acknowledging the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ and demonstrate publicly the knowledge of the Holy Bible. (2) Attending church services in public and in full view of the camera. (3) Election time, the Lord Jesus Christ and His Gospels to be included in their manifestos.

Bad news, Christine. The Science and Technology Commission’s Evidence Check on our Lord Jesus Christ did not go well for you.

Comments (0)

Dead baby jokes should be available on the NHS!

Posted by Andrew @ February 24th, 2010 10:44 pm. Filed under: Anything I Want Should Be Free,Rejected Petitions — Tags: CARL MAYO, Karen Young, Mrs Sherri Clarke —

Stop facebook allowing their site to be used to publicaly abuse the pictures of deceased babies and the sick jokes about them.

by Karen Young (rejected)

Facebook at this time has received more than enough complaints and reports from its users to remove the pictures and the sick jokes about deceased babies, on this group there are upsetting pictures of children of all ages being abused, mistreated and dead. They havent shut the group down so we are requesting the Prime Ministers help to get it removed.

Get a vile group removed from Facebook. It is a group that goes by the name of DEAD BABY JOKES!!. This site has to be removed of Facebook as the jokes are sick. There is no joke about losing a baby. I know first had as i have lost two babies, both were stillborn when i was 7 months pregnant. i would be very grateful that you could help as remove groups like this off of Networking sites, and maybe set some rules that Facebook have to vet there site better!!.

by Mrs Sherri Clarke (rejected)

Just because I know these people sometimes Google themselves and find their entry here, I’d just like to say:

STOP FACEBOOK TO BECOME A PAY SITE.

by CARL MAYO (rejected)

this is to stop facebook asking for 3.99 a mouth so please join and pass on this

I’ll pass on that, thanks.

Comments (1)

What’s the difference between Gordon Brown and a dead baby?

Posted by Andrew @ February 24th, 2010 10:44 pm. Filed under: It Says So In The Daily Mail,Rejected Petitions,spelin an grammer — Tags: Michael O'Neil, Ollie hart —

let a child in to government.

by ollie hart (rejected)

we should do this as a child has more sense than gordon brown

give me a break.

by Michael O’Neil (rejected)

I WANT the ELECTED BRITISH Goverment who now reside now in Power. Who are servants of the people not the people who are servants to the goverment. Give to me a resettlement grant to leave this country to set up home elsewhere outside of the British Isles. As this Elected Goverment pays non-british persons who have not contributed to our society in any way, giving out benefits and other handout’s to persons only wanting to benefit from this institution. Also this goverment are going to pay insurgents in Afganistan not to shoot? The monies it pays to foreign persons to leave the British shores as a thank you resettlement grant is way beyound the pale. Therefore the Britsh Goverment owe it to me; MICHAL O’NEIL. The choice to become non-british and therefore have to pay me a resettlement grant to reside in another country of my choosing.

Bonus points for mis-spelling your own name.

Start a Human Culling Programme.

by Michael O’Neil (rejected)

More details cannot be shown

You may wonder why I’d include this in what is obviously a post of ‘ah, the government is generally crap’ petitions, but it was rejected because “it contained the names of individual officials of public bodies” so really it was less a sound environmental proposal than it was a hit.

Comments (0)

At least this would make Dave Gorman’s arm more accurate.

Posted by Andrew @ February 24th, 2010 10:19 pm. Filed under: Clearly You've Thought This Through,Rejected Petitions,Unnecessary Bureaucracy — Tags: DANIEL DOYLE —

Make the UK have a standard date format.

by DANIEL DOYLE (rejected)

Increasing globalisation and greater computer usage has brought about a problem that is becoming increasingly prevalent. Historically in the UK we have always used the following date structure DD/MM/YYYY but across Europe and North America it is more common to put the month first and I have even seen instances where the year is the put first. When we were an insular society this was never a problem as Johnny Foreigner could never organise anything but now with global communications, often confusion arises when the day is 12 or less. I therefore propose that a mandate is set to change our system to reflect how the majority of the rest of the world operate and we adopt MM/DD/YYYY as the norm for our date structure.

Confusing: writing dates differently than the French.

Not confusing: writing dates differently than last week.

Comments (3)

madness is hereditary: You get it from your children.

Posted by Ben @ February 23rd, 2010 6:00 pm. Filed under: I AM TALKING!,Oh Yeah? Let's See You Write A Better Petition!,Please State The Nature of the Medical Emergency,spelin an grammer — Tags: SHEILA of OURLOVEDONESTOOKTHEIROWNLIVES —

And now, a suggestion that, if implemented, cannot under any circumstances be abused:

ENSURE THAT LOVED ONES OF MENTALLY ILL ARE LISTENED TO.

by SHEILA of OURLOVEDONESTOOKTHEIROWNLIVES

Please make sure that with regard to Mental Health services the parents/ next of kin or loved ones that know the patient should always be listened to and referred to. If a parent or loved one feels that their child needs to be sectioned under the mental health act then they must be listened to..they know the child better than anyone. If they are not listened to then they should be given a very good reason why and the professionals should accept the responsibility of events that could occcur by way of ignoring the request

“Oh yes, my mother is definitely unhinged. Can you put her somewhere else? We’re planning on converting her room into an office, you see.”

Comments (2)

What’s in a namebadge?

Posted by Ben @ February 23rd, 2010 5:53 pm. Filed under: I'm serious!,Join the Fight Against Nebulous Bad-Sounding Things!,Nanny Knows Best — Tags: Richard Garland —

stop the planned introduction of name badges for police officers.

by Richard Garland

Why would we possibly put even one police officer at risk by putting their name badge on display. Why would we even subject one officer to the traumatic experience of having a criminal threaten them, and knowing their name which could at the very least cause them to feel threatened, or the obvious worse possibilities. Even if it only happens once, believe me it will happen. It’s simply not worth the risk. And it’s a really bad idea, I mean if our politicians are really considering this, I think they should be questioning their own ability to run a country. Does it matter if they dont have their name on their uniform? I mean, they have a badge number, and can easily be asked their name. I’ve heard the arguments for this, and they’re all easily brought down. Even if a lot, or most, of the police support this idea, at the very least a few will suffer anxiety, stress, and even violence as a result. Please reconsider.

Considering some of the dangers police officers risk on a day-to-day basis, I think having criminals yell their name at them is probably the least of their worries.

Comments (7)

Enough Rope?

Posted by Andrew @ February 23rd, 2010 2:29 pm. Filed under: It's Not Gay If Your Balls Don't Touch,Sex! Sexy... sex!,Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children? — Tags: Bob Wheeler —

Ed Balls recently tabled an amendment to the Children, Schools and Families Bill which would allow faith schools an exemption from the rules dictating what must be taught in sex education classes. I strongly oppose this exemption, but rather than explain why, I will post this petition from Bob Wheeler who believes the opposite and, I think, makes my case very strongly:

Abolish the Children, Schools and Families Bill .

by Bob Wheeler

Attack on parental choice

Currently parents have the legal right to choose which sex education lessons their child attends, if any. But under Government plans this freedom of choice would end on the child’s 15th birthday. In future we fear that this choice could end even earlier.Homosexual partnerships are ‘valued’as normal when common decency says that marraige between a man and a woman is the accepted and moral way to live. Children should be taught that .

All primary schools will be required by law to teach children as young as seven that homosexual civil partnerships and other unmarried sexual relationships should be ‘valued’ on a par with marriage.

Comments (0)